Please read what I have write , Im really appreciated it

Hi and hello to the world. My full name is Alif Arifin and I am 18 years old. I consider what I write in here is like the real-life diaries of my days after waking up in this world. I have 4 siblings who are still in school. I am still unemployed today because of the slower job opportunities during this quarantine. My mom is single mom and too old to work after she divorced my father. My father, who was traveling alone and worked as a laborer sent me some money to eat and sometimes it was not enough to share with other siblings. I haven't been to school for a long time because of family finances. Our family life is full of debt. Because my mother had to borrow money with the public and the government to support our family. I also feel sorry for her because she's getting worse. Im from Tawau,Sabah Malaysia. Sometimes we also seek the help of the government. Although not much but we are very grateful. But by the end of the month things are getting worse as food is scarce. My life also has been affected by Covid19 .Its getting worse.
Our Dream

Because of the hardships we have experienced. We have never dreamed of ever going out of state. The reason for us as a family or to go on a trip abroad is such an impossible thing. But we still have the dream of going abroad one day. With the help I will receive, I also want to continue studying abroad.