Light up my kids faces this Xmas!

Emma-lee Pettett Start Date: Nov 28, 2023 - End Date: Dec 27, 2023
  • Dysart QLD, Australia
  • Woodgate QLD, Australia
  • Toowoomba QLD, Australia

My Travel Story

by: Emma-lee Pettett Start Date: Nov 28, 2023 - End Date: Dec 27, 2023

I am a single mum of 3 respectful, well-mannered boys aged 11, 13 and 15.
It has been a very rough few years for myself and my children searching for a safe, secure and suitable place to settle and call our home after fleeing domestic and family violence mid 2019. We have suffered more domestic violence as a result of being found by my ex partner and the boys father no matter how far away we go. I buy new laptops and phones everytime, open new emails, bank accounts, everything all beginning fresh, he is relentless in discovering our location. The efforts of Centrecare, redcross and other domestic violence support groups to put security measurements in place has not stopped or prevented his persistent aggressive behaviour. I had lost employment because he would stalk my work everyday or call the work phone 600 times so no customers could ever get through. I ended up having to organise financial hardship schedules for all of my loan and bill providers, a good percentage of which were his but were in my name because he couldnt get anything approved in his name because of past bad debts. I have reported every breach of the order, however, I was left disappointed and unsuccessful with the outcome everytime. It eventually lead my eldest (13 at the time) to run off with his father under the belief that he was protecting me and his younger brothers. This was the most gut wrenching moment of my life to know that my son, who had severe PTSD from suffering physical, mental and emotional abuse at the hands of his father everyday for years, felt that the only way that we could be safe and free is if he stayed with his father no matter what that meant for his wellbeing. That decision tore me to peices not knowing if he was ok mentally, physically, emotionally he had always been a mummas boy. Of course his father used this to his advantage knowing that losing a son would hurt me more than anything he could ever do. Everytime we have been in contact with my son, which was rare, he would take my son's phone and my son would suffer the consequences so I stopped trying to make contact so my son wouldn't have to suffer. I did not get to speak to him for his 14th birthday even though I tried, which absolutely destroyed me, leaving me a devastated mess for over a week until I realised that I had neglected to see the impact that my breakdown was having on my younger 2 boys so I decided to be proactive. I had quite a number of breaches of the DVO that I was still yet to finalise with police and quite a few more that I needed to report 156 in total. The police officer I was in contact with could only report, take a statement and finalise one breach at a time which meant it was going to be a lengthy couple of weeks but I was determined. I went to sleep knowing that I had to remain positive because my son's safety was my top priority.
I woke up after 2 weeks of being in a coma, extremely confused yet fiercly determined. My friends and family anxiously waited by my bedside each and every day for those 2 weeks just to be constantly given heartbreaking news that I would wake up blind, paralysed, significantly mentally impaired or to prepare to say their final goodbyes. I was labelled the miracle girl (which I hated) in ICU because no one was expecting me to wake up without any permanent impairments but I was one of the lucky ones. I spent the next 10 days learning to talk, eat, drink and walk again before I was able to leave hospital.
I was a passenger in a car accident. With the injuries I had suffered, the severe loss of blood and my level of consciousness I was clinically dead at the scene and had to be revived. Even with my seatbelt on, between the force of the first landing after the car went airborne and 100km/hr speeds, I was ejected out of the windscreen head first into a rock and then my 3 tonne dual cab ute landed on top of me crushing my chest and spine.
The amount of life threatening critical injuries I sustained was quite extensive. I suffered a traumatic subarachnoid haemorrhage, intraparenchymal haemorrhage, bilateral temporal and frontal lobe contusions, global cerebral oedema, had compression and burst fractures from my T3 through to my L1, spinal process ligamentous injuries, severe spinal cord shock, a massive hematoma extending down the length of my back, 6 broken ribs, bilateral pneumothorax and atelectasis, haemothorax, cardiac tamponade, pneumopericardium, pneumomediastinum, pulmonary haemorrhage, a pelvic bleed, a ruptured oasopagus, torn muscles ligaments and tendons in my left shoulder and neck, a fractured left hand and deep lacerations all over my face and neck.
Paramedics, the RACQ careflight team, fire fighters and police worked tirelessly for 5 hours to bring me back to life. I had a blood transfusion on scene, throat and chest tubes inserted to stabilise my chest injuries. I was rushed to theatre where I had my skull drilled into to 3 times to insert drains to relieve the cranial pressure, life support tubes inserted, repositioning of the bilateral chest tubes, extra drains inserted into my chest cavity and heart to remove the air, blood and fluid surrounding my heart and lungs, direct lines inserted into my heart and lungs, my oasophagus repaired and a feeding tube inserted, my fractured hand repaired, the extensive lacerations stitched and the debree removed from my wounds in my eyes, on my face and neck.
I have no memory of the accident or the couple of days beforehand so I am not sure what happened that day. I am grateful that my children were not in the car as I have since found out that the driver stole my car, was unlicensed and was under the influence of illegal substances. Unfortunately due to financial hardship (kind regards of my ex partner destroying any chance I had of financial stability) I could only afford to have 3rd party insurance on my car so I still have an outstanding debt for a car that I no longer have. Forensics are still investigating the matter 12 months after the accident to determine if my ex partner tampered with my car and if it caused the accident.
He currently owes me $27000 in child support because as he says he refuses to pay me for his children because if I can't afford to take care of them then they can just go live with him and he will take care of them but also says that he shouldn't have to pay for children when there is no DNA test to prove they are his. I have offered to get a DNA test done and he refused. We were together 16 years, all the children were planned, I was faithful and loyal and have no issue having a DNA test done, I actually want one done so he can stop telling his children they aren't his.
Due to the accident I spent months trying to recover lost memories such as emails passwords etc so I lost a significant amount of information I needed to proceed with the breaches against my ex. To add the cherry on top, my phone was lost in the accident and has still not been recovered or found so I basically was left with no evidence of the breaches, and only one way to get my son to safety. I had to initiate parental orders through the courts which can be quite expensive. Due to the accident leaving me with a diffuse axonal injury, although relatively unimpaired, I still suffer from chronic fatigue, headaches, mental confusion and slow processing at times. That's on top of the physical injuries in my spine with the t12 and t5 burst fractures leaving kyphosis which limits my mobility in terms of speed, twisting and standing for long periods. I have been informed that both head injuries and spinal ligament injuries can take 2 years to heal so although my wounds and fractures have healed, I'm still in the process of healing and cannot return to employment leaving me in severe financial situation.
During my recovery I have been financially strained because I have not been able to work, he's not paying child support, and I have also suffered severe anxiety about my son's welfare but I have had to learn to just relax, accept the fact that I cannot do the impossible and to just be patient. After receiving a phone call from a concerned person involved in ex's life regarding my son's welfare my patience is wearing thin. My youngest 2 boys would love to see their brother and have asked me if they can see him instead of receiving Xmas presents. So now I am really torn and anxious. I only have one more centrelink payday before Xmas and I was using that to get their Xmas presents: laptops, new school shoes and the Xbox series X that my youngest so desperately asked for but I would really love to see my son to if only for a minute. It may be the only minute I need to get him to safety. I need to buy a cheap car or hire one so I can make the 12 hour trip on top of the fuel expenses, food, etc. I am not going to be able to afford to pay my bills, pay for this trip and get Xmas presents if only a couple to put under the tree
I can't afford to do all or even just 2 of these things. I'm a stickler for paying my bills but for Xmas I would love to take my boys to see their brother but I would also really love to see their faces light up Xmas day when there is actually presents under the tree as well.
It has been a long and tedious road for myself and my boys but I could not be prouder or any more grateful for my boys with the amount of strength and courage they have shown. They have been through more challenges life can throw at them in the past 5 years than any child should ever have to face. They helped me recover even if some days were just downright ugly and not pleasant. My children are the reason I wake up each day, the reason I smile and the reason I breathe. Last year I only got discharged from hospital a week before Xmas and I was wheelchair bound with no transport and barely enough money to put food on the table so there was no presents Xmas day. Xmas morning they gave me a hug and told me that I was their present because I came back to life just in time for them for Xmas.
My boys deserve to see their brother for Xmas and get the Xmas presents they asked for but I can't do the impossible which is why I am reaching out for help. Please donate to help my children reunite with each other after 18 months and still get the Xmas day bundle of joy under the tree that makes every child light up.
The trip with car hire, food, fuel, accommodation will be quite costly and the presents they have asked for are also quite costly so thank you so much for your support, generousity and your donations.

Your donations will have a tremendous impact on our lives and we will be eternally grateful.

  • Dysart QLD, Australia
  • Woodgate QLD, Australia
  • Toowoomba QLD, Australia